My MTC Experience
Where do I begin? I spent the entire first year thinking “What the HELL did I get myself into?” Seriously, I asked myself that every day. I spend every morning forcing myself to get out of bed. I cried every afternoon and morning. I was sooo emotionally unstable last year. It took so much for me to continue working and living. I didn’t really enjoy my personal life very much last year. I did however enjoy my students. To become a teacher I had to become a whole other person. I had to transform my normal personality into that of an assertive leader. I struggled with this transformation a lot last year. I took so much out of me. The dramatic change just drained me daily. But I learned how to be a responsible adult. I have grown up and matured so much in the last two years. It is amazing to me. I am not the same sweet, kind Ashley from two years ago. The real world is no joke!
I have also grown a lot as person. I am much more aware of my surroundings and my environment. I feel as if the way I see things has also changed a lot. I am more aware of other’s perception of things. I must say I am a much more liberal thinker than I was when I began this journey. Being from the south, I was raised very conservative. Teaching has changed many of my views. I have been able to form my own ideals. I don’t necessarily believe everything my parents, family, and friends believe. This experience has encouraged me to become more educated in all aspects of life. This new enlightenment has challenged me to question the laws and many of the conservative ideals. But at the same time, I must say that my relationship with the great Lord has grown dramatically!! I read my bible and pray more that I have ever done. I truly believe that even after my MTC experience is complete; my relationship with the lord will continue to grow. I feel that MTC gave me a chance to get rid of much of the junk I had in my life. It has given me a chance to clear my mind and think. I have become my own person. I am no longer the person people want me to be. I can’t describe how much this program has changed me as a person. Majority if not all of the change is for the better. I will always be great for that.
This opportunity has also given me a chance see how strong I am. Any other job will be a cake walk compared to teaching. I faced adversity everyday my entire first year of teaching. And…..I came through that adversity with my head held high. Because I changed schools after my first year of teaching, I was given the opportunity to see the other side of the tracks. I went from an all black school to a majority white school. I went from being in the majority to being the only minority teacher. I must say that the transformation was tough. It made me realize that this is still the good ole south. And that we have a long way to go in the “good” schools nevertheless what has to be done in the “bad” schools. Changing schools also gave me an opportunity to observe different leadership styles. This was important to me because I want to become a principal one day. I truly believe that the principal I had in Greenwood was a better hands-on, down and dirty principal. I think she is doing a great job at working toward a vision. It just seems as if she is against all odds and running an uphill race. Many of the things she does at Greenwood would improve Desoto Central. If only things could be different. Greenwood has a good principal; she just needs good teachers that believe in her vision. And if that combination occurs I truly believe Greenwood Middle could be a level five school. The students I taught in Greenwood were much smarter and able to learn quicker than the students I teach at Desoto Central. But the students in Greenwood don’t work as hard and have no goal or vision. The Desoto Central kids work extremely hard; good grades are important to these kids. They also have attainable visions and goals. The Desoto Central principal works on the “good ole boy” system. If you are not a part of this system, it almost impossible to be successful and to advance. He is a hands-off principal; he has the luxury of having very good teachers. This made me realize how important good teachers are. This just drills the importance of MTC. MTC gives bad schools good teachers. Good teachers can help a lot; they are able to cover for a bad principal. Good teachers are more important than good principals.